A toast to my daughter on her wedding day: what to say

A toast to your daughter at her wedding has four parts: one true story about her, a welcome to her partner and their family, a wish for the marriage, and the glass. Keep it under two minutes and say it in your own words.

This page is for any parent, step-parent or guardian giving a short toast. If a son is marrying, see our toast to my son on his wedding day.

The outline

1. A welcome (15 seconds). Thank the guests for coming, especially anyone who travelled.
2. One story about your daughter (45 seconds). One real memory that shows who she is.
3. Her partner (30 seconds). What you see in them together.
4. The wish and the toast (20 seconds). A short wish, then ask everyone to stand.

VirtualSpeech's guide to speaking rate gives 100 to 150 words a minute as comfortable, so two minutes is about 200 to 300 words. Our free wedding speech timer times your own pace.

Example lines to adapt

These are original to this page. Replace the brackets with something true.

Opening:

• "I am [Name]'s [mum/dad]. I have known her for [age] years and I have never once won an argument, so I have asked her permission to say a few words."
• "Thank you, all of you, for being here. I have been looking forward to this for a long time and dreading it for exactly as long."

The story:

• "When [Name] was [age], she [specific thing]. We told her it could not be done. She did it anyway, and that is the first time I saw how determined she is."
• "[Name] has always been the one who [specific habit, such as remembering everyone's birthday or staying until the last person left]. [Partner], you have married someone who looks after people."

Her partner:

• "[Partner], the first time you came to the house, [Name] asked me not to say anything embarrassing. I have kept that promise for [number] years, until now."
• "[Partner's parents], thank you for the person you have brought up. We are lucky to be one family."

The wish and toast:

• "[Name], I am proud of you every day. [Partner], look after her, and let her look after you. Please raise your glasses: to [Name] and [Partner]."

What to leave out

• Old boyfriends, or comparisons with her siblings.
• Anything about her appearance or her age.
• Long advice about marriage. One sentence is enough.
• Family disagreements or who paid for what.
• A list of everyone. If you need help with thanks, our guide to thanking your parents and guests has the order, and the thank you speech from the bride and groom shows what the couple will say back.

If you get emotional

Pause. Take a breath. Look at one friendly face. A toast this short is easy to write on a single card; the free cue cards tool turns it into numbered cards to print or read on a phone.

Choosing the story

If you cannot decide, write down three things: a moment you were proud of her, something she does that makes other people's lives easier, and something you notice about her with her partner. Pick the one that makes you smile. That is your story, and nobody else in the room can tell it.

Where to stand and when to speak

Ask the couple or the toastmaster where you fall in the running order, and whether there will be a microphone. Wait until the room is quiet and everyone has a glass before you begin.

Say the first line slowly. Nerves make people rush, and the opening is where you are most likely to. Plan the very first sentence word for word, then trust yourself for the rest.

Start your draft

Answer five questions on theweddingspeech.ai about your daughter and her partner, and see your free speech preview.